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Today we’ve been married for 15 years (and together for 19)!

15 years of marriage

Yes we are high school sweethearts! We grew up together, changed together (is anyone the same at 18 & 20 as they are in their 30’s?) had 2 boys together, bought 2 houses together…

Here’s to more years, more memories and more adventures!

How do we make it work? Allowing each other the space to change and supporting/encouraging each other to grow. It’s not 50/50 in this house. We strive for 100/100, but the reality is that sometimes someone has to give more and other times that same person needs more. It’s a pendulum where the goal is the middle but sometimes you give more, and sometimes you take more, and that’s ok.

We laugh. A. Lot. We don’t take ourselves too seriously.

We argue. Communication means nothing gets built up inside so working it out when the issues come up saves from a lot of grief later on. It also teaches our boys that addressing issues head on is important to working out problems.

I like to think that I’ve loosened him up a bit. He’s a bit more adventurous and spontaneous than he was 19 years ago. In turn, he keeps me grounded, but without stifling my dreams.

I drive him crazy. He drives me crazy.

He’s a very big part of me and yet allows me to be my own person. Our identities include each other but don’t drown each other.

Is our marriage perfect? No. Do we expect it to be? No.

Is it hard work? No, I don’t consider it work. It’s life. Life is awesome and life is really, really hard. Sometimes you have to work at making things work, and sometimes the pieces just fall into place.

I can’t wait to see what adventures the next 15 years takes us on. In the next 15 years our kids will be grown and we’ll be figuring out a new chapter in our lives. Who knows what God has in store, but we’re ready for anything. Together.

For now, I’ll enjoy this stage, this day, this year and try to hold on to these memories because man, did those last 15 years fly by in a flash.

How long have you been married? Any advice?

January 28, 2001

Author

Allison Waken is the founder, writer, photographer, and content creator of All for the Memories and All for the Boys.

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